LA Dating: Jealousy
I can’t stress enough how important it is to have trust in a relationship. Without trust there is no relationship, PERIOD!
It’s sad that some people are so insecure that they ruin perfectly good relationships because of their own trust and issues. If someone is spending copious time with you, answering all of your calls and messages, and gushing to friends and social media about you - that’s a sure sign that they are genuinely into you. Come on now, read the signs! Don’t question their loyalty and love for you when it’s crystal clear that they don’t want anyone but you.
When someone doesn’t trust you there is nothing that you can do to change that. I know, it’s unfortunate but it’s the truth. No actions, matter of time, or constant reassurance will make them think or feel otherwise. They will always wonder what you’re doing on your phone, where you’re going, and why you didn’t answer when they called five minutes ago. This isn’t a relationship; this is more like a luxurious prison. There’s nothing worse then constantly being questioned and even when you’re being honest you start feeling like you did something wrong which is not how things should work in a loving companionship. This is definitely unhealthy and will eventually evolve into a toxic relationship where someone will end up getting hurt. You also don’t want to start resenting the person because of things you feel like you cannot do since it will most likely upset them; not a way to live a happy life.
Recently I dated a guy that blatantly told me that he did not trust me. This is not the first time that I’ve heard this and I think I know why. For one, I’m not a 4’2 hobbit that wears Crocs and Juicy Sweatpants paired with Urkel glasses. I am 5’10, model type body, with a great sense of style. I am very secure with myself and tend to be on the outgoing side. To a guy that is attractive and appealing which at times draws me a lot of unwanted attention. That’s life; we are all put on earth to procreate so there’s just nothing that I can do about it when I’m being stared or hit on. I mean, what am I suppose to do, live in total exile off of Pink Dot delivery so I am hidden from the world? I don’t think so! I’m not wasting my last good years away from my natural habitat because you can’t get it together… See ya later alligator!
Insecure guys are the worst types of guys. They are a bit on the controlling side and will always be jealous of even the smallest thing. One wrong word or sentence could possibly unleash a whirlwind. Yes, it means they love you very much, but there’s a thin line between love and obsession. A relationship is suppose to be about two people coming together and making a positive impact in each others lives. It’s suppose to be loving, carefree and most of all honest.
Jealousy is a disease; it ruins friendships and relationships. If you find yourself dating a guy that somewhat resembles the above then save yourself and run for the hills. It’s cute in the beginning but when your phone is smashed, your building intercom keeps going off, and you start getting “blocked number” calls; shit just got real… real scary.
There are a bunch of great guys out there that don’t have self esteem or insecurity issues so don’t feel like you can’t find better, you always can and you will! As Maya once sang “I’m movin’ on”.